Wednesday 3 March 2021
I have had information about my CT scan. My complicated mass has not changed. The tumors around my ovaries, my pelvis my fallopian tubes have not grown nor shrunk. Well that is a good thing ! However the cancer in my liver and spleen have grown 'considerably'. So in the heat of the moment I forgot to ask for any more details, like by how much are we talking? centimeters or what? Is this normal for the secondary cancers to grow and not the primary? We talked about how the maintenance drug was not doing it's job in containing it.
I now know that with Caelex it takes about an hour and a half to go through the first time, then the next month an hour and if all is well just half an hour after another month. Then I will have another scan to see if it is doing anything. If it is working then I can have another 3 treatments.
As usual it takes a while for me to absorb new information and then calm down and accept it. I allways go through the phase of realising OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO DIE. Then into a spiral of, well how many different drugs can they try out on me? If I need a new one every 8 months how long does that give me ? All crazy questions because nobody can answer them. So then it is the realisation that this is my life now. A cycle of of having blood tests, scans, treatments, then if I'm lucky a period of time where I don't have to put destructive substances into my body. I have had roughly 3 months free of drugs. I feel really well and strong. I'm in a good place ready for my next blast of chemo. Bring it on !
Thank goodness for the NHS. Thank you for all that you are doing for me. An amazing service and organisation full of caring and generous people.
How wonderful that you are feeling well and strong and ready for your next bunch of medicine! Who knows what wonderful drugs they will keep coming up with to keep you fit as a flea! I know what you mean about letting things sink in.. it's amazing the loops and jumps the mind goes through as we deal with and process things! It sounds like your marvellous courage and optimism leaps to the fore every time! Keep going, amazing woman!
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